Register Sunday | March 18 | 2018

Slow News Year

White man murders wife and unborn child! Was he insane! No, seriously, what kind of white people are we raising these days? This whole generation is fucked up. When I was a kid, white people didn’t kill other white people. Especially not white people with another new white person inside. That’s genocide and white people have too much going for them to wipe out other white people.

So let me get this straight. Some dickhead affluent white man, who is having an extramarital affair, kills his wife and unborn child. Um... So? No, I mean, seriously: so fucking what?

These are sad and terrible events. This is a sick and disturbed man. That poor woman. That poor child. But is this really, what's the word I'm looking for, oh yeah: News?

The overwhelming stench of coverage has reached itself into my nose and down my throat. The special insight offered on CNN, MSNBC, ABC, TNT, TBS, CBS and all over the internet, the suffocating manner in which the networks and papers has surrounded this story, have made a mole hill out of a speck of dust.

A friend of mine a few months ago asked me what I thought of all the Scott Peterson stuff. “I don’t.” I told them, and when they insisted that I would care about it eventually I assured them I would not. I know nothing about the case. At all. I know only what the headlines have said, and the GUILTY verdict that’s ringing around the Internet. You’d the Nazi’s had just been convicted at Neuremberg for the total tonnage that’s been dedicated to it.

But this isn’t news. This never was news. There was nothing newsworthy about this story. It just was what it was. A damn shame. A too bad. A that really sucks.

Right now news directors everywhere are combing for a certain set of circumstances. White woman. Dead. Pregnant. Married. Affluent. Husband with girlfriend.

I’d like to ask them to stop. Because this isn’t news, and I’d be willing to bet that most of the people who read about it did so out of some convulsion towards car wrecks, not because they genuinely cared or wanted to.

The respect we can pay the dead that we don’t know is to feel more alive as we feel a slight pang of pity for their misfortune. This is natural. The 1,000,000 column inches and 368 days of our lives that following this story wasted is not.

So, please, stop. We shouldn’t care this much. This wasn’t news.