I was on a first date with this guy. He was cute and artsy and working on a book. The get-to-know-you was taking place over tapas and a litre of the house red. The wine was decent and the grilled shrimp delicious, but the Q & A got to be a little much. Two bites into my paella, I was hearing about his disillusionment with love. This was what his book was about; his theory was that there are two reasons people want to be in a relationship: either boredom or loneliness. He asked me what I thought, and, very unusually, I found myself at a loss for words. I didn’t want to think that he was right. In fact, I didn’t really want to be thinking about loneliness and attachment issues at all. This was the first date, for the love of God. I was looking for good ...